When I wanted to be more conscientious about my money, one mindset shift I had to face was my fear of appearing “cheap.” Whether or not I had the money to do things, I didn’t want to say I couldn’t do it because I didn’t want to pay the money.
The connotations of being cheap are negative, we think of the friend who disappears every time the check at dinner shows up and then neglects to pay you back on Venmo. Then, you’ll see them the next week with showing off their expensive new bag.
It’s those cheap outliers that give saving money and frugality a bad name! This shame around being cheap is also the reason we can look rich, splurge on our friends but then struggle to pay the bills.
Sammie and I decided to compare what it means to be cheap versus frugal. We dive into why cheap is considered negative and how to be frugal instead.
The biggest reason we don’t like when people are cheap, is because often times it means that they are putting people out. If they don’t pay for their part of a trip, everyone else is stuck paying more. Or they pay for the dance class, but then complain the whole time about the price and criticize all the details. That ruins the experience for everyone.
Part of this is poor planning. It’s ok to not value the cost of something. But if you know your values and plan ahead, you can make sure you spend luxuriously on the things you love and have firm boundaries when it comes to not attending events you don’t want to pay for. I remember the first time I witnessed someone with strong boundaries around money. They openly shared that they would not be attending because it was out of their budget, but wished us all well. I realized in that moment that most people will respect anyone who is confident in those choices.
Frugal people know their values and know what they want to spend money on. It took me a while to accept that I never want to pay thousands of dollars to sleep outside. Every outdoor festival sounded cool in theory, but I hate sleeping in the cold. However, I’m always willing to spend money if it means spending time with people I love (indoors).
Take a listen to this episode as we breakdown cheap vs frugal. Sammie and I share stories of when we have been both. It’s not about being perfect, it’s about getting better with every purchase and making the right decision for you the next time. When you know your values, it also makes it easier to express to others.
Now our frugal friends, do you have a frugal tip for us?
Show Notes:
Ramit Sethi on ABC News - "Cheap vs. Frugal"
We love his perspective on spending on your rich life and saving aggressively elsewhere!
Community Time:
Thank you to our cousin and another podcast host, Jojy, for recommending this topic! Find her podcast below:
Ron shared that he was listening to one of our classic episode, How To Negotiate a Higher Salary, and he decided that for his new job, he’d be creative and ask for things like a sign on bonus and relocation. They said yes! Congrats Ron, thank you for sharing that win!
Happy Birthday to our friend Luca! He’s not only a listener of our podcast, but a strong supporter. At his party, he was inspired by our “How To Have A Party With A Purpose” to include a speech that was very important to him. At the end, he quoted Build A Wealthy Spirit!
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